1. My visit is coming to an end, and I can see that my mom is ready for me to go.
Examples of petty topics we have had tense conversations about:
- Online banking
- Me keeping in touch with my nephew (I want to, she doesn’t want me to)
- Parenting
- Periods and women’s health
- Russian nationalism
- Dad’s care
- Mom’s hearing (or, lack of it).She doesn’t hear but is refusing to get a hearing aide.
I made dad a chicory drink yesterday (a substitute for coffee that dad is cleared to have) but she remade it because I didn’t make it “correctly”. It’s water and a half a spoon of powder…
She is under a lot of stress, caring for my dad, being of age herself, and she may need some space. Although my presence is to help, it also may be triggering for her because of our prior history of being estranged.
I leave this Saturday morning, at 3:15am to make a 6am flight to Moscow.
2. Ballet
Yesterday I went to the ballet and opera theater. Theaters in Russian seem to be divided into categories: drama theaters (mainly plays), ballet and opera theaters (ballet+operas), concert halls (music performances), marionette theaters (shows with puppets), chamber theaters (those usually have a very small stage), children and youth theaters.
So this theater is strictly for ballet and opera performances. I saw Raymonda ballet. It was a complex and beautiful ballet, and I enjoyed it immensely. The house was full! I went to this theater multiple times when I was little. I remember watching Giselle, Swan Lake, Sleeping Beauty, the Queen of Spades, and other performances.
3. Sauna. Yesterday I went to sauna to spend some time after dad fell asleep. The sauna was called “Tortuga” – the Turtle, and had a variety of pools and saunas. My favorite was Russian Dry and Turkish Hammam. I toasted my bones, read my book, zoned out. In other words, rested. On my way back I got caught in a huge thunderstorm!
4. France. I am thinking and worried about the heat wave that is currently strangling Europe. We leave for France on July 13th and may experience the heat wave in its full force. I’ve been reading Meteo site, hoping the heat and thunderstorms ease up. The hottest region for now seems to be Provence since it’s the southernmost region. The other places we’ll visit – Dordogne, Loire, Bourgogne, Alsace- seem to be cooler.
5. Feelings. A lot of feelings to process. Guilt. Home sickness. Anxiety. Relief that I will soon see my husband and kids. Worry about my upcoming travel back to the US. Worry about how and when dad will receive the care he needs. Worry about my mom’s health and her age (she’ll be 80 in October) and whether she can handle my dad’s care. Whether she can handle her own care.
To conclude, sharing with you a picture of a pedestrian street in Chelyabinsk, next to the theater.
Mom of Children 